If you’re looking for the most disgusting and terrible protein bar on the market then look no further. Here’s the BioTechUSA Chocolate Chip Cookies Zero Bar which is the frontrunner for the title of ‘most disgusting of the year’ in the category ‘protein bars’. Really.

We’re very sorry if anyone (apart from BioTechUSA, the manufacturer) feels offended by this intro, but we couldn’t have started our review any other way. It was simply impossible. After tasting Chocolate Chip Cookies Flavoured bar, we can safely say that it’s ‘absolutely disgusting’ and you should definitely avoid it at all cost. Unless you’re looking for a thrill? If yes, then you should definitely prepare yourself before taking your first bite.

BioTech USA Zero Bar Chocolate Chip Cookies Flavoured 20 Grams Protein Bar
BioTech USA Zero Bar Chocolate Chip Cookies Flavoured 20 Grams Protein Bar

This BioTechUSA bar surely isn’t pretty and it just looks like one clump that has been sat down on. On the inside, on the other hand, there are some random ‘crunchies’. All in all it’s not very interesting. We know, we know, not all bars can look and be spectacular. And it’s not like we will immediately dismiss it because of that. We also won’t dismiss it because of its smell, which has nothing to do with Chocolate Chip Cookies, though it is a little bit sweet. Not that we necessarily want to try it based on that, but… On the outside the snack is very tough, but on the inside easy to handle, easy to chew. The bar is only slightly chewable and sticky. The moistness factor would be okay as well, however, it does require you to occasionally reach for a sip of water. If it wasn’t for the taste, though…

If we were to fully convey our taste sensations after trying this BioTechUSA bar, then… shock, surprise, disbelief, disgust…


And several other adjectives wouldn’t even come close to describing what we have gone through for you. After the first bite our taste buds were already attacked… nay! They were flooded by a sea of bitterness with an incredible force that shook us right down to our core. A bitterness that only lets through the smallest hint of cookie flavour. But that’s not helping, either, because this bar is simply disgusting and has a very, very unpleasant taste. And then comes the overwhelmingly bitter, shocking aftertaste. After the first bite, we hoped we could wash away this sensation with a bit of water or a flavoured beverage. After the second one (the things we do for science, eh?) we were looking for sand paper to get this ridiculous flavour off our tongues. But to no avail. Shock. Disbelief. A million unanswered questions. After one hour after the first bite we finally were able to collect ourselves…

Do we want another serving of this bar after the first one? How to say it? BioTechUSA Chocolate Chip Cookies Flavoured Protein Bar is the first one we tested that we weren’t able to finish. Or even eat half of it. So here we give it only 1 point out of 10, which more or less means: only for fans of really, really crazy taste thrills.

In this case, the macros don’t really matter, so we might just as well not even write them down. Out of decency, we will show them to you. The 50g bar contains only 179 kcal and 7.5g of fat, 6g of carbs (0g of sugar and 3.25g of polyols), 6g of fibre and 20g of protein. Pretty strong stats. Similarly to the ingredients, where we won’t find either added sugar, palm fat nor glucose-fructose syrup. Quiet applause.

Perhaps we’re repeating ourselves, but BioTechUSA Chocolate Chip Cookies Protein bar is just ‘absolutely disgusting’.


We can’t say much else, except for perhaps that the sensations you’ll get while eating the bar are absolutely incredible and unbelievable. We are sure that this one will take home the award for ‘most disgusting protein bar of 2019’.

And no, the good ingredients and macros won’t change that a bit.

Will we ever go back to this bar? Maybe we’ll surprise you with this, but… we’ll buy it again when we get the chance and we’ll keep it for the eleventh hour! Because when all hell breaks loose, when we’ll be horribly in debt and our beloved dog runs away after all these years of love and devotion, then we’ll eat this bar again and realize that there can be something even worse in the world still.

P.S. Because this bar has earned 1 point in one of the categories (after the last bite, which wasn’t even the last bite of the bar) theoretically it shouldn’t even be reviewed by us. But we know way less about setting up websites than about protein bars, so we’ll leave it like that, as a warning.

5.0
Score

Pros

  • It has great macros

Cons

  • It's not a tasty bar
  • It contains palm fat
  • Nutritional info given for 100g only
Smell
5
Outer firmness
2
Inner firmness
5.5
Taste
3.5
Moistness
7.5
Nutrients
7.4
Ingredients
5
Overall experience
4

Final Verdict

It is simply ‘disgusting’. We can’t say much else, except for perhaps that the sensations you’ll get hile eating the bar are absolutely incredible and unbelievable.